The Anatomy of My Thoughts = Rowan-ism

About the "normal" thing some of you may have heard me babbling about. I guess you can say that I'm fairly upset at that word. I'll explain below: Normal in the dictionary means: Conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal; regular; natural. Serving to establish a standard. approximately average in any psychological trait, as intelligence, personality, or emotional adjustment. free from any mental disorder; sane. Here goes- defining the context: The "normal" I'm talking about is not a physical status... but simply a "state of mind". So basically according to the definition above, if you conform to THE standard i.e. the norm , you are normal. Who decides what the standard is? Does that mean that if I don't conform to this given standard- I'm not normal? So, after a bunch of rhetorical questions I've come to the conclusion that normal does not exist. Society has put forth this standard of normal which is fairly ...

I can't stand it! My Internet connection has been reestablished but I still can't go online because the damned modem is on the fritz! Sigh. I feel so isolated from the rest of the world. I miss watching movies, downloading songs and just plain talking to people online. Oh by the way, my old phone number is in service so you can contact me with that number. Just in case you lost it- 91546513. For those of you who say "Gasp! She posted her phone number online!"- I roll my eyes and say: Please, its not like a lot of people read my blog or even know about it. Sigh... call it sad but I seriously think that no more than 30 people read my blog. I have more contacts on my cellphone. Sigh... the term tests start on Thursday if I'm not mistaken. I'm fairly bummed about this whole block teaching thing. It is indeed really irritating. I just got my term test results for PMT and voila! A failing grade of 23/25. Whoo! I am fairly worried- duh! I did study for three days for...

Its so freaking weird that few people get that "If You Seek Amy"= F-U-C-K me. There's a fair amount of hype over that song in other parts of the wold but personally, I think that even though the song is suggestive, its not as bad as other suggestive songs because kids under the age of 7 are probably going to just think that its a song about a girl named Amy. It is, but its also about a celebrity lifestyle. On other things, my folks and I went out to town with the intention of watching a movie. We didn't because The Terminator isn't out yet and I don't want to watch a sensored version of Angels and Demons. We ate Thai food instead. Yum. My parents are having their anniversary soon (they celebrate it twice a year because they got married twice) and I'm glad that they're going to celebrate it. 23 years together is a long time. I hope they stay together for many more years to come- hopfully not just because of me. Anyways, I feel so lazy these days. My fin...

I did wonderfully for the PMT Term Test! - In my freaktarded dreams. I didn't even know that it was supposed to be a term test. The final episode of season 8 of American Idol was pretty darn awesome. Cindy Lauper, Gene Simmons, Queen Latifah, Lionel Richie and Jason Mraz all performed. It took the sting out of Adam's defeat. In the last few episodes of AI, I wasn't as in to him as I thought I'd be. I found myself rooting for Danny Gokey. His voice was just mmm mmm good. I was so shocked when Ryan announced that Kris was in the top 2. I could't bear to see Adam or Danny go. Personally, I think Kris' performance wasn't THAT good. Kris' cover of Kanye West was brilliant though, hence it was granted the priviledge of being my blog song. Buzz me online for the song. This week has been hectic and pretty hellish. I was sleep deprived from doing the PMT project and I had to get up early to finish PMT. On top of that I was worried for GMP. It turns out that I had...

93466160- that's my temporary number. I am dog tired. Lectures were boring. Rushing the BPT practical report was a nightmare. Its hard to concentrate when there's a PMT quiz just looming over the horizon. Debate was okay- less embarrassing than I thought it would be. I got paired up with the amazing Blob! Whoo ! He's really an awesome debater. When you first see Blob- you'd think that he was absolutely average in every way but when he gets up to speak...you go "whoa". There was no magic though- he fed me my entire speech and that just killed the moment for me- no thrill, no fear. How am I supposed to learn how to create a good argument if someone spoon feeds me an argument . I was the first speaker though and I think my delivery sucked. I managed to have dinner with the guys (My parents would be appalled if they found out that I was the only girl there!) and naturally with debaters , a very enthusiastic discussion arose from the mundane conversation. I wa...

I know I haven't really been blogging lately and its because I am extremely moody. I'm basically waiting for my temprament to simmer down to the point that I know that I'm not overreacting. Many things have happened. The most important one, I will not mention because I think that I am bound to over react when it is brought up. Thursday- I fought with my mother. I changed my number temporarily and will post it up here as soon as I find out what my new number is. Sigh.... the home phone line got cut. Thank the gods that the internet services are still intact. How on earth do they expect me to survive like this!! I HATE BEING BROKE! Friday morning... my GMP group met up after a night of useless MSNing which only left me frustrated and made a dent in the GMP project workload. It was nuts! XJ is hillarious. We did a marathon of so called "project work". Dr V. met up with me, justto check up on things. She thought that I was going emo again. She was right, but I wasn...

I am wonderfully and blissfully distracted. I as I have already written on a much earlier post a few years back- which I believe was entitled "distracted", I do love distractions. It takes me away from all of the normal, routines of day to day life. I have a really good book at hand. I have a pretty awesome CCA to look forward to and I just recently discovered a whole "new" musical world outside the realm of what I would normally listen to- old school rock and roll! I guess you can say that its pretty easy to distract me, also it seems that I might just be finding a nice little niche for myself. Life is pretty blissful except for those nasty things I wrote about in the previous blog entry. School's sending out nasty shivers of reality with the project deadlines and quizzes coming up. I know I will need to focus sooner or later, but I'd rather it be later. People do say that ignorance is bliss and I'd have to agree. I've been so deliciously ignorant w...

I feel so overwhelmed by what is going on around me. My parents have no idea. The financial crisis my family is facing is starting to scare me. I want to complete my education and my mum agrees with me but my dad is getting old and frankly I don't think he can put me through college. I don't think I can put myself through college either. Pa wants me to just work. This is also taking a toll on my parents relationship. On May 26, they will spend their 23 anniversary. I honestly hope that instead of putting a wedge between them, these problems will hold them together during the times when they need each other the most. I don't like my course although I keep saying that I do. I feel as if I should have taken Mass Communications, Psychology or a Design course because I feel like I'm made for that kind of thing. Science has always been a passion of mine but it seems like I don't have the aptitude for it. Okay, I probably do... but that roaring fire that kept me going tow...

Beware- this blog entry is a jumble of ideas and thoughts, you might get a headache trying to understand it. The Internet has really revolutionized the way people perceive the world and how we gather information. I am just amazed at how this thing- this network of people, ideas, experiences and facts gained influence in my life over the past 10 years. Believe it or not, I only learned how to use the Internet when I was 11 and I see children taking to it like ducks to water. I have this family friend, who has a 3 year old toddler by the name of Kristen. I was amazed at how Kirsten knew how to play online games almost instinctively. She'd ask me to go to the Disney website and she would take over from there- clicking the games link and playing the games- even before she knew how to read the instructions. It was beyond cool. YouTube.com is not just a website for entertainment- its a revolutionary tool that people use to express their ideas, peddle their wares and share their knowledge...

Yesterday was orientation for the debate team. It was pretty fun except for this one time when an inappropriate comment- made by one of the senior members left me speechless in front of a crowd. - I'll explain later- I am in a rush and just decided to blog to de -stress. I just got home because my parents decided to go for the evening mass instead of the morning one. I normally do my work in the evenings so ... my "work time" was cut short. So, after changing to more comfortable clothes I looked at my planner and I realized that I have loads of work to do... project related of course. I hadn't realized that I had procrastinated myself into a corner so in short... I am now swamped and have to do tons of research double time. To top that off- my internet connection is on the fritz. Arrg! I feel so freakishly guilty because I'm not used to producing atrocious work for projects and I just recently handed up a pile of stinking bull crap. There are two project meetings...

I just found this awesome song in youtube.com by mone of the most awesome youtube bands out there. I would have wanted to actually post the video up here but well I can't for some reason, youtube doesn't allow you to embed videos from selected channels. So...the best I can do is give you the link: Click to watch "Tonight" by Boyce Avenue. If you want a copy of the MP3 buzz me because I ripped it out of youtube with Audacity. I wouldn't have resorted to ripping it if itunes were available in Singapore or if I could find their album here. Anyways... Its 6 am and for some unfathomable reason I'm still up. I made good use of my time though...I was on a music hunt and boy do I have a good haul. A must listen is this LOCAL band I found via myspace.com called "Postbox" - they have a pretty good female singer and they have an EP out- which I want to get. Its really very sweet.

Yesterday was brill. Lab was cuckoo where we were pretty much making complete fools of ourselves and having fun while we're at it. Yas, Jessic and Fel made like fainting goats- you know the trust game where you fall backwards and your partner would catch you... that was the theme of the lab. It was so hilarious! Picture courtesy of Fel- it looks like we're too freaked by the swine flu epidemic doesn't it? Apres much whining and begging, I finally got my mum to extend my curfew so that the girls and I could go watch 17 Again. It was so completely sigh-worthy, Zach was completely sigh-worthy. I would gush but then I've already annoyed 3 people by simply gushing over Zach's pretty blue eyes and awesome hair. His acting wasn't bad either. There were loads of funny parts especially with the cheerleaders saying- "you don't have to respect me... you don't even have to remember my name!". Pretty much all of the teenage girls in the movie was Zach Efron...