Manner minding
I think I have a case of acute social impaired-ness.
Sometimes I wonder why I'm so challenged in social intercourse, but then I think again and realize that somewhere along my learning curve, my social skills went one way and my speaking skills went the other- I know that sounds ridiculous because you don't often see one without the other.
After all of these years, can you believe that I regularly offend my mother? My very own mother doesn't get me! My dad too, sometimes but not too often.
If you've met me, you probably know that I am fairly comfortable in my own skin- maybe too comfortable. Some people find me cocky and rude but that can all be attributed to a generous sprinkling of self esteem- I was taught that, if I believed in myself- or at least acted as if I did, people will believe in me. The Asian culture values humility. See the clash?
Asian families feel that elders deserve more respect hence since I treat everyone pretty much as an equal to me and, someone gets offended. I'm still working on that. I thought that the greatest form of respect is to treat one as ones own equal. I think that I behave this way because when I was young, I was surrounded by the western society values that inculcate that all men are created equal, they should be treated equally.
I keep offending people and catching myself saying the stupidest, most insensitive and inappropriate things! I know that people don't normally get in trouble for thinking, but guess what, I do! That's the problem when I speak without thinking about how the person on the other end of the line may interpret my words. The devil is indeed in the details. I am so easily misunderstood.
It all comes out wrong! Why oh why? This is so not the first time. Another part of the problem is that when someone says something, I always try to read into it and end up over analyzing and basically making something out of nothing or vice versa.
This happens to most people I'm introduced to and all usually ends in a tangle of false impressions.
I should so watch more Asian shows. Asian etiquette is much more difficult to master, especially the part pertaining to the respect of elders and people you don't know. My attitude seems brash and that won't get me far in this town.
Moving around in different countries is so confusing.
Sometimes I wonder why I'm so challenged in social intercourse, but then I think again and realize that somewhere along my learning curve, my social skills went one way and my speaking skills went the other- I know that sounds ridiculous because you don't often see one without the other.
After all of these years, can you believe that I regularly offend my mother? My very own mother doesn't get me! My dad too, sometimes but not too often.
If you've met me, you probably know that I am fairly comfortable in my own skin- maybe too comfortable. Some people find me cocky and rude but that can all be attributed to a generous sprinkling of self esteem- I was taught that, if I believed in myself- or at least acted as if I did, people will believe in me. The Asian culture values humility. See the clash?
Asian families feel that elders deserve more respect hence since I treat everyone pretty much as an equal to me and, someone gets offended. I'm still working on that. I thought that the greatest form of respect is to treat one as ones own equal. I think that I behave this way because when I was young, I was surrounded by the western society values that inculcate that all men are created equal, they should be treated equally.
I keep offending people and catching myself saying the stupidest, most insensitive and inappropriate things! I know that people don't normally get in trouble for thinking, but guess what, I do! That's the problem when I speak without thinking about how the person on the other end of the line may interpret my words. The devil is indeed in the details. I am so easily misunderstood.
It all comes out wrong! Why oh why? This is so not the first time. Another part of the problem is that when someone says something, I always try to read into it and end up over analyzing and basically making something out of nothing or vice versa.
This happens to most people I'm introduced to and all usually ends in a tangle of false impressions.
I should so watch more Asian shows. Asian etiquette is much more difficult to master, especially the part pertaining to the respect of elders and people you don't know. My attitude seems brash and that won't get me far in this town.
Moving around in different countries is so confusing.
Comments