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Showing posts from December, 2010

Empty

I don't know if you've noticed but I feel like my latest blog entries lack conviction and resonate with a certain hollowness and superficiality. Perhaps my muse has fluttered to another individual in even more desperate need of inspiration. The darkness creeps in from time to time. Sometimes the will to feel something than utter neutrality washes over me. Where has that passion and fervor gone? My life has become nothing more than soulless fluff filled with the simple pleasantries of daily life. Its sad to think that some people would be utterly satisfied with living my life but here I am, longing for something more... something immaterial - I don't even know what that is, all I know is ... I'm thirsty for life.

Bleak Christmas

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Christmas again. Well thank the gods that I'm not particularly in the mood for some celebrating because if I was, then I think melancholy and suicidal thoughts would have creeped into my consciousness . Thank you very much for making me a non believer. Christmas was not a total bummer. Sure it wasn't the warm, gooey family filled Christmas that my relatives have recently taken to, but hey, it was actually fun! My newly acquired colleagues are a pleasure and even a treat to be around. Perhaps that's because I feel like they are going through the same things that I am. I mean this season I am away from my family and pining for them, and so are my fellow OFW friends. Together in misery? Not really. I don't mind being with them when the clock struck 12 and even after my working hours, I stayed within the premises. They're all so sweet. <3 Emergency Pharmacy's Christmas Party ...and yes... I was wearing a dress.

Dorian Gray

I have become rather absorbed by this book entitled The Picture of Dorian Grey by Oscar Wilde. It has everything I would like in a book. Some romance, some murder (or so I've heard... I haven't gotten to that part yet) and best of all some pretty interesting ideas. As most of you are well aware, I have this fascination with the idea of hedonism, and complete and utter selfishness, particularly because everyone is "secretly" hedonistic and selfish. We all have these thoughts in the back of our heads (or at least I do) and we simply just refuse or perhaps rationalize not going through those selfish actions. Here we have a character... Dorian Gray who lived absolutely isolated from the real world, pure and well... unspoiled by anything. Suddenly he was exposed (by Henry) to certain hedonistic schools of thought that leave him completely uninhibited by societal rules... blah blah blah and lives life fulfilling his "evil" id. Then we have this Lord Henry who love

No Parents?

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I know two blog entries is a rare occurrence here in Rowan-land, but well... I thought the previous entry. OK ... I know this happened practically a week ago...but I feel the need to declare my love for the following people: Next, I need to get this off my chest... I am so glad that I can finally have my room back. Late shifts are really difficult to do especially when you don't get enough sleep ( or when you're practically living in someone else's room). I love my family to bits but well... they can get on my nerves sometimes. See, a group of relatives came down to visit / holiday. They outnumbered us and lived for 3 whole days in my room. The little things bothered me and nagged at me. I am an only child and I'm quite used to being by myself most of the time so I have grown accustomed to liking things the way I've made them to be. I guess you could say that I get pretty territorial. Anyways, when they left for the Philippines, they took mum with them. Its strang

Sexy accents?

WARNING: Prepare for vapid and shallow girl talk. - Don't judge. You have vapid and shallow thoughts too. Its strange how talking to a Average Asian Joe lookalike with an deep voice and an American accent AND perfect grammar gets me all hot and bothered. He just seems more intelligent? What is it with that accent? When an girl has it...It just sounds vain and pretentious, but when an ASIAN guy has it, he becomes slightly more sigh-worthy. - And yes ladies... I am rather well aware that I just dissed my own manner of speaking, but I do believe that it is true, hence all of the stereotyping that goes into well... judging me. I just thought I'd mention that since that particular thought occupied my mind for at least 20 minutes today, and I was hoping that some of you may feel the same way too. The anecdote. I was dispensing to this well... average Joe as I had put it earlier, and as I explained his child's medication, I was mesmerized by is eloquence . He didn't just say